Dying to Be Me: My Journey from Cancer, to Near Death, to True Healing

by Anita Moorjani

Dying to Be Me by Anita Moorjani is an extraordinary memoir that details her near-death experience (NDE) and subsequent miraculous recovery from terminal cancer. The book is a deeply personal and thought-provoking account of Moorjani’s journey through illness, death, and ultimately, to an awakening that transformed her entire life. This memoir stands out for its honesty, vulnerability, and the spiritual lessons Moorjani conveys, which challenge conventional notions of illness, healing, and what it means to truly live.

The narrative begins with Moorjani recounting her four-year struggle with cancer, specifically Stage 4B Hodgkin’s lymphoma. By the time she was admitted to the hospital in early 2006, her body was overwhelmed by tumors, and her organs were shutting down. As she slipped into a coma, doctors informed her family that she had only hours to live. It is at this point that Moorjani experienced what she describes as a near-death journey—a moment when she crossed over to a different realm and encountered a profound sense of unconditional love and understanding.

During her NDE, Moorjani describes feeling detached from her body but acutely aware of everything happening around her, including conversations among doctors and her family members in the hospital. She explains that in this state, she experienced a profound sense of interconnectedness and clarity, where time felt fluid and she understood the reasons behind her illness and the deeper meaning of her life. Moorjani vividly conveys the feeling of being enveloped in an all-encompassing love, free from fear, pain, and judgment. She realized that her fear and self-imposed limitations had been significant factors in her illness, and she came to understand the importance of embracing her true self without fear.

One of the most compelling parts of Dying to Be Me is Moorjani's account of her decision to return to her body. Despite experiencing a realm of immense love and unity, she recognized that her journey was not yet complete and chose to come back, knowing that she would heal. Remarkably, her recovery began almost immediately after awakening from her coma, much to the astonishment of her medical team. Within weeks, her tumors had shrunk dramatically, and she was soon declared cancer-free. Moorjani attributes her healing not only to the physical care she received but also to her deep spiritual transformation, where she let go of fear and embraced her authentic self.

The book is not just a recounting of a miraculous event but also a spiritual guide, as Moorjani delves into the lessons she learned from her NDE. She emphasizes the importance of self-love, authenticity, and the dangers of living in constant fear. Her insights challenge the reader to rethink the nature of health, disease, and how emotional and psychological factors can profoundly impact physical well-being. Moorjani encourages readers to shed the fear of judgment and embrace their uniqueness, arguing that love and authenticity are fundamental to living a fulfilling life.

Moorjani’s writing style is conversational and accessible, which makes the book feel like an intimate conversation rather than a lecture. She does not position herself as a guru or expert but rather as someone who had a deeply transformative experience and wants to share it in the hope that it may help others. Her honesty about her fears, her cultural background (growing up in a traditional Indian family in Hong Kong), and the pressures she faced makes her story relatable. Her vulnerability, especially when discussing her initial struggles with self-worth and the fear of not meeting others' expectations, adds depth and authenticity to her narrative.

While the book is deeply moving and inspirational, it may not appeal to every reader. Skeptics might find the lack of scientific evidence or empirical explanations for her recovery to be a gap in the narrative. Moorjani’s emphasis on spirituality and metaphysical concepts might not resonate with those who prefer more grounded or clinical approaches to understanding health and healing. Additionally, some may feel that the book’s tone, which emphasizes positivity and the power of thought, borders on being overly simplistic when applied to the complex nature of serious illnesses. However, Moorjani does not claim that her experience is universally replicable; instead, she presents it as her personal truth, which may provide hope and insight to those open to its message.

One of the strengths of Dying to Be Me is Moorjani's ability to bridge the gap between personal experience and universal spiritual insights. She draws connections between her own healing journey and the broader themes of life, death, and the human condition. Her reflections on fear as a destructive force and love as a healing power are particularly impactful, especially given the context of her recovery. These themes are woven throughout the narrative in a way that feels natural rather than forced, making her insights feel applicable to various aspects of everyday life.

Moorjani also takes time to address cultural aspects that influenced her life, such as the expectations of her Indian upbringing and the conflicts she faced living in a multicultural environment. These elements add an additional layer to the story, highlighting how cultural conditioning can shape one’s beliefs, fears, and ultimately, health. Her discussion of these influences helps readers understand the depth of her transformation and the courage it took to redefine herself after her NDE.

In conclusion, Dying to Be Me is an inspiring memoir that offers readers a glimpse into an extraordinary journey of illness, death, and a rebirth of understanding and purpose. Anita Moorjani’s story is not only about her miraculous healing from cancer but also about discovering the importance of self-love, authenticity, and living without fear. Her reflections challenge conventional views on health and healing, encouraging readers to see beyond physical symptoms to the emotional and spiritual dimensions of well-being. While not everyone may agree with her interpretations or find the spiritual aspects of her story compelling, there is no denying the profound impact her experience had on her life. For those open to exploring the interplay between spirituality, health, and the power of the mind, Dying to Be Me provides an enlightening and deeply moving perspective on what it means to truly heal and live authentically.